Ok, there actually is no way to put into words all I learned on my recent voyage into the deep ceder forests of Breitenbush. And if there were, I fear I lack the subtle eloquence to get it just right. But I did have a teaching that will branch into a deeper teaching…and I think it fitting to share.
I met a man named Vance. And he figured out my game pretty quickly…and for that I am thankful…for many do not. He asked me to tell him something I felt and experienced that day. I told him Kindness. He told me no. I looked at him like a child who is totally confused. I told him compassion. He told me no. I again looked at him bewildered. I told him a few other of my choice emotions that were coursing through me. He told me no. He said, I’m asking for something you felt…not thought. What came from your heart…he asked.
I said happiness. He said that is the first true thing you have said to me.
He told me there are only 5 things we can feel. Happy, Sad, Afraid, Angry and Joyous. Everything else is what our brain is telling us we feel or think. These five emotions are the only emotions of the heart.
I sat with that.
He told me everything I was feeling was in my head. That there was a disconnect. That I’m using words, and not feelings.
Now, I’m a writer. So I had to sit with that too.
He told me a bunch of other personal stuff too…which as much as I love to share…this feels sacred so it’s stays with me. But I must admit, I have been thinking about this every day. Putting my feelings into these categories. Getting really clear like a child how I’m ACTUALLY feeling without making it all flowery and romanticized….oh how I do love the romance of words.
It’s an interesting process I thought you might enjoy. He offered the exercise of writing every day for two weeks 5 feelings I experienced in all 5 emotional categories. For instance: I felt happy when my lover rolled over and put his arms around me this morning. I felt angry when I was mowing the lawn and realized I had to do it twice. Etc Etc…
So, I learned that…and oh so much more….
So I am home. And working with this profound sense of Joy that I am naming Joy with my work and with my clients. And I would love to share that with you if you want a little…
Happy Summer to You sweet friends. Happy happy summer!