We are always talking about how important it is to give. Donate to this. Charity work that. But there is a population of us out there…and yes, I include myself in this group…who have no problem giving…the trick lies in receiving.
It seems hard to imagine for some of you I bet. Receiving comes as naturally as breathing. But for some of us there is this block that comes up. This wall. And I’m going to name this wall right now.
Vulnerability.
That’s the name of the wall. Mine has a placard that I make more beautiful every year. I shine it and embellish it and sometimes even sing to it like Lilly Tomlin sings to the birds in 9 to 5.
You see…that’s exactly it. That deflection. And I am really going to hold myself to staying on point in this post because I would like to reach all of those who receive AND all of those who are beginning to notice those around them who always seem to be giving, but never allowing anything in return.
I could call this a blockage of heart qi. I could call this a problem with being fiercely independent. But the truth is…what is truth? But the “truth” is underneath it all. Under the muck and guck of our beautifully maintained placards is some belief that we don’t deserve it.
And I know those of you who know me are thinking….but…Elisha doesn’t have that thought. And I assure you…I wish that were true. That underneath it all, when someone comes to give to me…that I wasn’t thinking…there are other people who deserve this more.
And as I write this I feel a deep sadness in myself. Because what I KNOW in every cell of my being is how amazing it feels to give to someone who is really receiving. I LOVE IT! And it charges me up. Feeling people come into deep states of relaxation, and coming back into their bodies fills up my heart qi and my spirit and helps me sleep better at night.
So this is for those of us out there who have difficulty receiving….please read that and know when someone offers and wants to give to you….it feels good to THEM! So putting up a fight, or my personal favorite, assuming they don’t really want to give…they are just doing it because they have to….only limits the joy THEY get to receive from YOUR RECEIVING.
Do you see how it’s all connected? If folks on my table didn’t feel good about receiving, the treatments wouldn’t feel good to me either.
So knowing this, why do I still shy away?
I was compelled to write this blog post today because next week I am receiving. I am receiving a treatment I have actually wanted for years. Maybe 10 years. And I have scheduled it many times and each time, something has gone wrong and it’s been cancelled either by me or the person offering.
And this time I wanted to be in the right head space. Clear the monsters in the closet and rattle all my old stories so I can shift into a more balanced reality where I receive as much as I give. Because that balance is so very important.
And I hope you can find something that will bring you out from behind your perfectly crafted sign as well. Accept an offer and really mean it. Allow the giver to FEEL you receiving! See if it doesn’t change both you and your relationship with the other in some way. See if you can simply know that you deserve it and the offer is genuine.
And if you know someone who always seems to give and never asks for or receives anything in return, maybe just see if there isn’t something tiny you can offer them…no strings attached.
My partner brings me flowers home. He has them wrapped beautifully and they will just be there on the table for me when I get home. I love it. And I receive them and cut their stems and put them in my favorite vase…and then give him a big kiss of course….but that’s for both our pleasure 🙂
This is a big topic. Clearly larger then one small blog post…but an important point for discussion. Spring is the time for expansion! It’s also an Aries moon full of heat and passion and I think we should all aim at aligning a little with that!
Enjoy the gifts that are offered. They truly are for you.
